Making long-term lifestyle changes - such as introducing self-care techniques into your daily routine, involves changing your view of your world, yourself and what is possible. It takes time, patience and perseverance.
It also helps if you understand the process and the stages that you will have to go through before the changes are part of your everyday lifestyle.
Stage 1: Awareness
Awareness is the first stage of the healing process. It is at this stage that you wake up to the fact that something just doesn’t feel right, and hasn’t felt okay for a while. It is the moment when you finally find the strength and courage to decide that enough is enough and that you want to make a change.
It is during this stage that you should ask yourself:
o What do I want to change?
o Why is this important to me?
o What is holding me back?
Once you have awareness, comes intention - the intention to do things differently. But in addition to this, achieving change requires motivation and commitment to the process.
Stage 2: Preparation
This stage involves you taking the necessary steps to ensure success. As with anything, the preparation stage is vital. Get this right and everything else will be made easier.
o List individuals in your life who will encourage and strengthen you
o Outline how you will deal with any hurdles that may come up
o How will you manage your stress levels?
o How will you reward yourself?
o What will you do that makes the journey fun?
o Choose a start date
o Get others support to help you stay on track – make a list of these individuals
o Make the process part of your everyday life
Now that you have your road map to where you’re going and what you need to do, the actual work starts. For this you need motivation, commitment and support.
As you start to see changes, your self-confidence will grow, which in turn will increase your energy, commitment and motivation.
Stage 3: Action
This is where the real work starts. As with anything new, the first few days or weeks, will be the hardest, particularly since as humans we have an aversion to change. Breaking habits takes time and patience. Be prepared for a stage of uncertainty – of ‘falling off the wagon’, and possibility going back to your old behaviours. Forgive yourself – you are human!
This stage can last anything from 28-days to months. We are all different so be gentle with yourself if change isn’t achieved as quickly as your mind expects. This can be a difficult stage as you are caught between an old way of being, that although familiar, no longer works, and a new way of living that promises change and growth, but that is unfamiliar.
I find that starting a journal helps. Jotting down your feelings is a great way to help keep you focused and keep track of anything that comes up for you. Focus on what you will be gaining by making these lifestyle changes, rather than what you feel you will be losing. Look forward to where you would like to go/be/achieve, rather than backwards.
This is the time to use your rational mind to remind yourself that what you were doing wasn’t working and that you are committed to trying something new. If you are truly committed to change, then your only option is to keep moving forward, even if this means 2 steps forward, and 1 step back, at certain times throughout the journey.
Stage 4: Breakthrough
Once you allow yourself to be completely lost in the present moment, then breakthrough occurs. Your body starts to feel differently, your thoughts and view of the world and yourself has shifted. These subtle changes occurred without you becoming aware of them. There is no going back to the person you once were.
Stage 5: Integration
Congratulations – you believed in yourself enough to stay the course, so now the changes you made are a regular part of your life.
One final word of wisdom, when considering what needs to change in your life, remember to focus on what you will gain, rather than what you will lose. Psychologically the process of change is so much easier if your motivation is to move towards something, rather than away from something.
Rosanna Commisso - Founder, StressCare Solutions Living with extreme long-term stress has shaped my passion for helping others find their path to stress resilience through self-care. If you need support, I’m here to help you understand the impact of stress and provide guidance on how to improve your health and quality of life.
M: 0402 917 064